"Dear Mom, remember when?"

[Satanta]

Dear Mom.

Just wamted to say 'Hi',

Things have been pretty good. The health issues from childhood finally caught up with me but dad and his new wife have really helped me out. Sorry I haven't written sooner but, you know how it is.

I finally met that girl I wanted to for so long. Nice girl, pretty and funny. I'm sure you would approve.

I was thinking back-going over some old pics. Ones of you holding me as a baby and there was one of a German Shepherd. 'King', I think his name was?

Anyway, it got me to thinking about the good times [[and the bad. ]

I don't really remember because I was so young but Dad has told me about when I first got sick and you and Grandmother watched over me while he was in Viet Nam. How hard it was on you and he got a medical discharge to come home. Oh, she gave me that painting you did when I was a baby a couple of years before she passed away ;ast Spring, sorry I forgot to tell you.

Remember when I was what? Seven or eight? At the fair when I lost my helium filled balloon and cried when it floated away? I wouldn't let dad get me another because I felt bad he was going to waste the money. Was it there or another time when I dropped that sea urchin I got at a gift shop on the tracks of the haunted house and it got smashed?


Oh, remember when I was about eight and fell through the cardboard that covered the hole in the porch? I tell you, I was more scared of snakes under that porch than the gash that opened up when the nail tore my arm. Or when I cut the top of my thumb open when I was nine? Dad was at the laundry mat so I filled a plastic bowl with ice and stuck my hand in there then called. That was scarey huh?

All those things that happen as a kid that get forgotten about.

Oh! Remember graduation night? I got so sick from having to pee I threw up? Didn't even make the party did I?

I'm glad of a few things-that you weren't there at my different jobs... Had some fun that I never told you about.

At one of the restaraunts me and the cook used to food fight and sword fight with broomsticks. We, ummm...smoked a little weed on the outdoor walk-in, but you know me, I never got into drugs. Hope THAT wasn't a shock for you.

Dad walked in on myself and a girlfreind once-but if he doesn't tell I won't either.

Remember my job in the clinic? Boy, I loved that job until the health issues started catching up with me. Yeah, attitude went South but I got over it.

All the adventures and travelling over the years gave me an interesting perspective on life, you know. I can meet people almost anywhere and make freinds. I should be a poloitician except that the sense of honor I have makes it hard for me to lie to people. As you well know, most people do not want the truth.

Last thing I want to go through is the other health issues ending with my transplant. No one in the family tested for it so I got lucky with a non-related match. I knew when I woke up from the surgery that you and dad and everyone would be tickled pink about it.

Then again, I guess not since you haven't been in my life since I was what? Two? All those things and more that you missed. But I know you are probably well since I did get to meet you and your husband and my half-siblings when I was nine. I know you were anxious to have a good healthy set of kids since the daughter was what? Maybe three years younger than me and the son about five?

Guess as soon as you left me you hit the sheets back-first and legs spread to try for better.

It's o.k. though as I rarely ever think of you. A television show reminded me of you this evening-a sitcom where the main characters low-life father shows up after many years then leaves cold making the main wonder "Why doesn't he want me?"

How would you answer that?

Don't bother. Once I'm done with this letter you will fade into the past like an ember in a rainstorm.

[breezyhill]

dear sat,
I'm so sorry for your pain, and grief. been there, brother, but with my father. still feel it, too.

God bless you.
breezyhill

[Broken Arrow]

[ofuzzy1]

[[[Sat]]]



She missed a whole lot of important things and one upstanding man is diminished by it.

[ejagno]

Sat, my youngest sister was dumped by her biological mother. She asked me why her mom didn't love her on a daily basis and all I could say as a kid was, "But we love you and maybe she just doesn't know how so she gave you to us". My sister was 43 years old when she finally connected with her biological mother and actually had a lovely dinner with her. The mother died that night in her sleep from an overdose. I guess she really didn't know how to love or be loved.

[Satanta]

Actually, tho this reflects some of parts of my own life I wanted it to be the kind of letter anyone with similar experience could relate to.

I wrote it while watching a 'Fresh Prince" rerun that I'd seen before where the lead characters biological father pops up after 14 years then. like the POS he was, tries to skip out without any goodbyes or explainations leaving Wil wondering "Why don't he want me?"

I know a lot of people besides myself, with that experience so just wrote it up.