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Comments A few questions for Withdrawal readers
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  1. #1

    1 A few questions for Withdrawal readers

    A big thank you to all those who have taken the time to read Withdrawal. I would like to request your help, I definitely plan on finishing the story and publishing it. So to that end if you would take a few moments of your time and answer as many of the following questions as you care to it would help me be a better writer and in the end produce a better story. So please share your feedback positive and especially negative. Thank you so much.

    1. Do the characters seem "real"? Do you see them as people or just names ?
    2. Is the story line plausible? Could those things happen?
    3. Does the story keep your interest? Do you want to keep going?
    4. What mistakes did you see? Technical flaws, continuity issues, etc
    5. Does the timeline of the story "feel" right to you?
    6. What if any emotions does the story invoke in you?
    7. At any point do you lose interest in the story?
    8. Are you able to keep a sufficient mental picture of the scenes as the story progresses? Are the details provided enough?

    Thank you again

  2. #2
    Very good storyline, need to continue

  3. #3
    It needs to keep going. Good storyline. Dont let it stop mid story.


    WAB
    "A human being should be able to change a diaper, plan an invasion, butcher a hog, conn a ship, design a building, write a sonnet, balance accounts, build a wall, set a bone, comfort the dying, take orders, give orders, cooperate, act alone, solve equations, analyze a new problem, pitch manure, program a computer, cook a tasty meal, fight efficiently and die gallantly. Specialization is for insects."---- Robert A. Heinlein

  4. #4
    I have the next four chapters underway already and the ending finished. The remainder of the story is in place in my mind just haven't had the time to put it to paper yet.

  5. #5
    Blackguard in regards to your questions this is a great story, you have kept every on looking for more in my humble opinion I would not change a thing. Thank you for giving us the opportunity to read your story, looking forward to more of it. (soon)?
    Wayne

  6. #6
    Join Date
    Sep 2002
    Location
    MD
    Posts
    1,406
    one thing I don't like about "survivalist fiction" is that it seems like everyone always goes out scavenging and always finds a gigantic stockpile of whatever they need - ok look here is a basement full of 20 years of freeze dried food, a million solar panels and 749 guns.

    im glad your group has not done, it makes it more believable.

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    Location
    nw mountains
    Posts
    3,907
    There is one question I cannot answer and that is no. four. Like I said before, it seems very real while you are reading and when you think about it. Nothing super lucky, real life expectations as in casualties in firefights etc. I keep looking for more and hope you get the time to do so.

    Thank You for your effort.
    The word Bipartisan usually means some larger-than-usual deception is being carried out. George Carlin

  8. #8
    I am definitely not an expert but I do enjoy reading your story.

    Larry

  9. #9
    Join Date
    May 2001
    Location
    British Columbia, Canada
    Posts
    15,106
    Just wondering how far into the future you will be taking this story........I always wondered why with all the closets of clothes that people seem to have nowadays, they run out of clothing and have to replace it fairly quickly. Can see if they need warmer outfits or work boots/jeans, but the people in the subdivision thought they had run into treasure at the storage lockers when they found the clothes.

    Maybe they needed to have thread and needles to repair what they had, rather than throw away - maybe nobody wanted hand-me-downs?

    Maybe we should have the means to keep our clothing in good shape......

    Lot of expertise showing in your chapters. I just have a bit of a problem with all the training for the shooting, but that is just me. With just my husband and me, we wouldn't stand a chance in your scenarios.....but you have to have bad guys.

    Guess I am just a polite Canadian LOL.....
    True North Strong and Free

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